The Robin

 

Thanks to Plainsongs for publishing my poem, The Robin.  

Several years back I went to a writing conference and a special part of the conference included a one-on-one critiquing session with an editor.  I submitted a few poems for this critiquing session, including The Robin.  The editor had a few fairly helpful things to say about the other poems and I happily accepted them.  When he got to The Robin he just said, "I don't know what to do with this.  I think you need to rewrite it or forget about it."  

I was shocked.  It was, sadly, my first conference (and my only one mostly because I haven't had the time to do another).  He didn't have a kind word to say about any of my poems and then he told me to throw one away.  I honestly do not know if this is normal at all writing conferences or if it was just this conference.  I feel like I'm pretty open to tough critiques.  I had some tough critiques in college from both classmates and professors, and I also gave some tough critiques.  But we were taught to balance it with positivity if possible.  Perhaps that's the difference and the university I attended was a little on the Kumbaya side of the line.

After I came home from the conference I waited a few days before sitting down with the poems.  I put away my negative feelings and looked at the poems with a new perspective.  I loved them all.  I looked at them again and again.  And though there were small changes, and the few critiques he gave were helpful, I loved The Robin the most.  I opened up the poem to edit it probably 200 times for a couple of years, and I loved it every time.  But because he was an editor, I questioned whether I loved the memory of the poem or the poem itself.  I also wondered how well I was conveying the memory.  And I questioned the line breaks and the funky beginning.  I questioned each word.  And I questioned the feelings the poem gave me.

Eventually, like all my poems I submit, I realized that all it takes is for the poem to matter to one person.  To give one reader the same feeling I get when I read a poem I love.  And as long as I think I've polished it to the best of my ability, why wouldn't I share it?  So I did.  And I hope others continue sharing their poems too.  Reading a poem that resonates with me is one of my great joys in life.

The Robin is a little bit more than a poem for me.  It's about battling my insecurities and inner critic and taking chances.  If we don't, how will we ever connect with each other and be a part of each other's worlds?