2019 was an excellent year for music. There were about thirty albums on my list this year and I spent most of my waking time (except when I was helping patrons and Izzy with her homework) listening to music. This is my first year ladies did not show up in my top ten. They were certainly in my top twenty, but 2019 was all about the gents. As always, there are a few albums from 2018. These are albums I couldn't get or didn't' have time to listen to until after the new year.
If I were to describe 2019 in a few words, this would be it:
* serious but hopeful
* spontaneous bursts of raw emotion that lifted me up, made me feel a little uncomfortable, sometimes leaving me dazed and perplexed, and motivating me to give life 100% (and feel a little cheesy about it)
* uplifting
* surprising
* life-changing
* Strange noises and mumbling
* A few hymns, some choral elements, but not as much banjo as I was hoping for
Here is my top ten. Enjoy!
10. Josh Turner - I Serve a Savior (favorite song - Doxology)
9. Calum Scott - Only Human (favorite song - Dancing On My Own Tiësto remix)
8. James Blunt - Once Upon a Mind (favorite song - Champions)
7. American Authors - Seasons (favorite Song - Deep Water)
6. Andy Grammer - Naive (favorite Song - I Found You)
5. Vampire Weekend - Father of the Bride (favorite Song - Hold You Now)
If you've every wondered what it would be like to take a journey in the dryer with a fluffy comforter, listening to Vampire Weekend's album is about as close as it gets. I don't always know what's going on in a Vampire Weekend song, and I've sometimes stared at their lyrics until the words blur. But I always feel so much more receptive to what I call 'peopling,' which means going out into the world and doing things in the presence of other humans like working, shopping, and other things that fall under the adulting category. I can't believe I'm saying this but perhaps my favorite thing about Vampire Weekend is how friendly they sound, and how that friendliness tiptoes through my prickly self. Father of the Bride is by far the friendliest of their albums. I usually wait to read the reviews until I've written mine, but I listened to this album for about five minutes before I had to find out who the mystery lady singer was. I read this beautiful thing by Mike Powell, who is both brilliant and frustrating depending on the article -
"Several of the songs (“Hold You Now,” “Married in a Gold Rush,” “We Belong Together”) are literal duets between Koenig and Haim’s Danielle Haim—the sound not of one person thinking it through but two people hashing it out, of yin slowly reconciling itself to yang."
Hold You Now is my favorite song on the album. I love the conversation between Ezra Koenig and Haim, but more importantly, it reminds me of the song, Missa Luba: Kyrie, which is one of my most favorite songs. I nearly fell out of my chair when I heard Hold You Now the first time.
4. NF - The Search (favorite song - Nate)
The desolate landscape with the empty shopping cart and black balloons looks like your typical NF cover, but the music on The Search is a bit different. NF even talks about this difference on one of the tracks, how he has stepped away (but not completely) from the apocalyptic trailer music and choral elements. At first I wasn't thrilled by this. It's one of my favorite things about his previous albums. But his raw honesty, how he probes and interrogates the trauma he's endured, shines a spotlight on his insecurities while grasping for any kind of confidence he can, and occasionally slips back into the darkness that tries to consume him, keeps me listening. I was hooked the moment his empty shopping cart creaked through the opening of the first song and sliced open a torrent of emotions (none relating to shopping carts though).
When I listened to Nate the first time I was driving to work and had to pull over. I was so overwhelmed by all the different emotions I needed space to process them. Since Izzy came to live with us, the word 'trauma' went from a word we never used to one that peppers into our everyday language. After listening to Nate, I decided to do something that probably wasn't very responsible, but I played that song for her later. She was completely quiet the whole way through the song, which isn't like her. She likes to talk. A lot. At the end of the song she looked at me and said, "that song speaks of my past." We talked about why it spoke to her, and I think the door between us opened up just a bit more.
That's the beauty of NF. His torment, the quicksand of his trauma that he's constantly battling, and how he shares that battle through music, helps others battle their own demons. I can't imagine how battle-weary he is after four albums of this, but my gratitude is immeasurable, especially at this point in my life. I think I'm speaking for a lot of people when I say this, but some times the only way I can face myself or get rid of the negative energy I feel when I think about the people who have hurt Izzy is to take a moment and listen to his lyrics. His music gives me a safe place to process some big hurts. His story is a little bit my story, Izzy's story, and so many others. I have nothing but praise.
3. Avicii - Tim (favorite song - Fades Away)
In most of the songs on Avicii's album, Tim, there's this moment when it sounds like someone drops the plinko puck on The Price is Right. It's a really shallow and simple reason to love an album as much as I love this one, but that's why I love it. I also appreciate the variety of artists he collaborates with - artists I know (Imagine Dragons) and artists I've never heard of (Noonie Bao).
2. Mumford & Sons - Delta (favorite song - Rose of Sharon)
I'm pretty predictable, even to myself. If you tell me there's rosemary in something I'll make a stink about it and probably won't eat it. But if you don't tell me there's rosemary in something there's a possibility I'll like it. Rachel and I were sharing a blueberry polenta scone recently and really enjoying it. We found a little twig, which prompted more searching. Turns out it had rosemary in it too. So what the heck does this have to do with Mumford & Sons. Everything. When Delta came out I knew it was going to be in my top ten albums of 2019, and I hadn't yet listened to a single song.
I did eventually listen to it (about a minute after getting it), and just like their other albums, loved it. But it was too obvious a choice for me so I tried to talk myself out of how much I loved it, because it was such an obvious choice. At some point I had to get over it, because Rose of Sharon ended up being my favorite song of the year, and pretty much my anthem. It's a burst of joy right at the very beginning, building to this incredibly sweet love song that has done to my soul what ivy does to a stark house. I always have a Robert song of the year, and this is it. It's a beautiful reminder that love can make us stronger and better if we surrender to it.
1. Hozier - Wasteland, Baby! (favorite song - Would That I)
Like Vampire Weekend, Hozier's lyrics occasionally baffle me. But I love his music enough to pluck lines that work for me and let his soulful voice do the rest. On his latest album, he's still very much a soulful, powerful singer, but there are some upbeat, mainstream-sounding tunes, which is an interesting blend I've been calling soul pop (this is probably already a thing and may not have anything to do with Hozier). My favorite thing about Hozier is how he can go from mellow to yelling with absolutely no transition. It just happens and always lifts me to my feet. This album is my number one this year because it was the album I listened to most while writing in 2019. Other than "Big Pimpin," anything System of a Down, and a small handful of other songs, I listen mostly to classical music with absolutely no words, not even opera, which I love, while I write. I find myself starting to think about the lyrics too much and I also worry about the lyrics influencing my writing. A few songs on Hozier's album made the list of songs that I can not only listen to while writing, but songs that also inspire and motivate me. My favorite songs are 'Would That I," which has some of that spontaneous and powerful yelling I love and "To Noise Making (Sing)," which not only has a choral element but also some incoherent mumbling at the end, which I'm always a fan of.
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